WTF Kind of Marijuana Caregivers Are You?!!!

.

Don't bother to answer the question... I already know.

or TOKE AND DRIVE

Of all the stupid, irresponsible actions of Lyin' Lynda Allen, Theresa "Brassy Boobs" Brassey and Corkscrewed Cornelia Green, yesterday's was the most egregious yet. They let Brassey drive! alone and stoned! (Of course, all three of them are always stoned nowadays.)

At 10:18 a.m., Brassey poked her head out the back door, emerged, and waddled unsteadily toward the cars, checking about to see if anyone was watching her. The hired handyman appeared to take no notice... at least until Theresa climbed into the Big-Ass Black Pickup Truck, turned it on, and began at 10:21 to execute a T-turn in the constricted, overcrowded yard.


Yesterday's configuration of tents and sheds
on Allen's & Brassey's property
(new additions and re-locations daily)

At that point, the handyman made a beeline to the screened porch and relayed a warning message. Within seconds, Corkscrewed Green popped out the back door and quickly jogged to the truck as Brassey pulled up to the driveway gate. Green quickly returned to inside the house, passing Lyin' Lynda emerging out the back. Green intercepted Brassey out front and held a confab with her on the street. At 10:25, Brassey hesitantly piloted the Big-Ass Pickup Truck away to the south.

There was way too much urgency displayed during this episode to be merely a case of Brassey forgetting a list of building materials or groceries. No, I've had the unfortunate experience of living next to the unstable pair, Allen and Brassey, for almost four years and Brassey was clearly acting erratically (and, more seriously, without the Alpha Bitch's express permission.)

When asked to vote on the 2010 Proposition 19 - Legalize Marijuana in CA, Regulate and Tax, voters in San Joaquin County rejected giving dopers unrestricted access by 61% to 39%. (Even all the Left Coast potheads and other useful idiots could not overcome a statewide rejection of 54%.)

Statewide:

Yes Votes - 3,897,789 46.0%
No Votes - 4,574,463 54.0%

San Joaquin County:

Yes Votes - 45,263 38.83%
No Votes - 71,295 61.17%

But (and this is a Big-Ass Truck-sized But), residents of the state are saddled with that partial birth abortion known as the Compassionate Use Act of 1996 (CUA), HSC 11362.5. In subsection (b)(2) is this verbiage:

"Nothing in this section shall be construed to supersede legislation prohibiting persons from engaging in conduct that endangers others, nor to condone the diversion of marijuana for nonmedical purposes."

"Conduct that endangers others" explicitly applies to DUI operations of motor vehicles.

Of course, police can't test and won't enforce; D.A.'s can't win and won't prosecute; courts are already... well, you know... too screwed up to interpret laws correctly any more; the past governor reduced "minor amount" possession to no more than a traffic ticket; and the current governor will... will encourage the pothead lawyer legislature to completely legalize grass.

I'm guessing Brassey would have to kill herself (like) - and likely someone else (dislike) - before a successful DUI prosecution would stick in SJCo. (Except, live people say only nice things about dead BDG's...)

To top it all off, the San Joaquin County D.A.'s office failed in their CUA responsibility to construct and maintain files of registered sex offenders medical marijuana users and their caregivers. No one knows WTF is going on! The whole damn house of cards is built on the intrinsic integrity of law-abiding pot smokers and the thorough-going professionalism of certified so-called doctors who write the Marijuana Recommendations. (Which is to say, we're screwed.)

Is anyone willing to tell us how well the CUA - that bad law imposed by duped doped well-meaning idiots in a direct democracy and left to citizen self-enforcement by incompetent (we say) and underpaid (they say) officialdom - just how well is that bad law working out for us? The answer is not to completely legalize weed, but to put it back under competent medical authority - if such can be found. (We may just be screwed, after all.)

And the Barefoot Dirty Girls of Manteca grow the best damn Sierra High(c) brand of shit, smoke it by the potful, and happily! euphorically! hungrily! hit the roads and highways of our locale in their Big-Ass Black Pickup Truck.

The BDG's mud flap motto?

UP YOURS

ASSHOLES AND SOCCER MOMS!

WE'RE GRANDFATHERED

CERTIFIED CAREGIVERS!

.

We're Off and Running...

.

I'm officially listed as a Manteca City Council candidate by the San Joaquin County Registrar of Voters, and the Secretary of State has randomized the alphabet for listing the candidates on the ballot.

For the two council seats, I'm first in the field of four, followed in order by Anderson, Hernandez, and Harris. (The mayoral field will be listed as: Cantu, Weatherford, Perry, and Moorhead.)

My Candidate Statement will be printed in the Voter Guide and campaign signs have been ordered.

.

How Crazy is Running For Manteca City Council?

.
A recent comment on the Manteca Bulletin Online system was made by someone who appeared to be a first-level student from the Rex Osborn Office of Double-Tongued Spin-Doctoring and Character Assassination, a city-paid position. There was an echo, a repetition, a redundant enunciation, another insinuation of the perjorative innuendo and slander leveled at me during Rex's clever misrepresentation of city (in)actions regarding my case and his intentional sowing of deprecatory seeds during the forty-minute public abortion at the March 3, 2009 City Council meeting. The subject was supposed to be the illegal activities of my neighbors and the city administration's refusal to enforce city codes - or even to review their own shirked responsibility for the whole sorry, sordid affair.

The commenter suggested I get counseling. Counseling?! Oh, I sought counseling, all right - legal counsel! Many, many dollars of legal counsel. Much more than I will spend on this campaign for city council.

Credentials? I am totally blown away by the inadequacies and irregularities that have surfaced in this so-called city during my three-year "campaign" against both my ignorant, nasty, noisy Neighbors From Hell and City Hall. I have graduated - pummelled, bloody, still standing - from a crash course offered by the Manteca Citizens College of Do-It-Yourself. I am the proud recipient of a Lifetime Go-To-Hell Degree, with gratuitous endorsements from the Police Department (Code Enforcement) and Community Development (Zoning).

The city folks I've dealt with on the other side of the cute, lily-white picket fence at 1001 W Center Street, Manteca, were all trained and graduated with a

B.S. degree in Bumbling Bureaucratic Bufoonery (BS_B3)
(The "Practical Machiavelli" honors endorsement is available for a small fee)

Lower Division courses (All tracks)
   Basic and Intermediate Finger-Pointing
   Basic Shifting of Responsibility
   Plan A: Maintaining Effective Deniability
   Plan B: The Bald-Faced Denial (only for those with Performing Arts aspirations)
   Disarming Irate Citizens: Those Records Are In Storage
   Disarming Irate Citizens: Blame It On the Computer System
   Disarming Irate Citizens: Blame It On the Economy
   Disarming Irate Citizens: Are We Supposed to Know the Codes?

Upper Division courses (Management track)
   Wig-Making and Disguise: How to Look and Speak Like an Official
   Bathtub Cooking and Applying of Black Market Teflon
   Intermediate Shifting of Responsibility and Assigning Blame Elsewhere
   Laundering Public Funds [Semi-]Legally
   Back-Scratching for the Career-Minded Municipal Professional
   Jurisdiction Changes: She's Old - She Must Be Grandfathered
       (prerequisite: Disarming Irate Citizens: Those Records Are In Storage)
   How To Write Official Looking Reports and Letters:
        Section 1: Saying a Whole Lot of Nothing With Words
        Section 2: Using Boilerplate Effectively (for those who fail Section 1)
        Section 3: Scaring The Hell Out of Docile Citizens

Senior Seminars in Special Administrative or Elective Skills (Choose any or all)
   Quid Pro Quo, Vigorish and Other Sometimes Useful Latin/Italian Terms
   Working Your Boss' Reelection Campaign: Pitfalls, Evasions and Workarounds
   Bright-Lining With the Malleable Underpaid City Attorney (bring hand sanitizer)
   City Contracts v. the Brown Act (Art elective)
   Driving Semi's Through California's RDA Loopholes, and Other Shortcuts
   Media Questions: The Side-Step and William Henry Lane Tap Dance (P.E. credit)
   (Call for full selection and details)

Selected sample of collected Master Theses (How To's) and Doctoral Dissertations (Time-Tested Propaganda Manuals - extra charge applies) available for checkout. .pdf upon request. 

• The Joys of Inbreeding: When One of "Us" Gets Elected (Career development for retired administrators)

• Rigging, Deploying and Repacking Golden Parachutes (high profile users only, please)

• Writing (and Rewriting) Employment Contracts For Fun and Profit Cost Savings

• Rubles From Rubes: Painless and Almost Undetectible Taxpayer Shakedowns

• Empire Building as Preface to World Domination: Manufacturing and Exploiting Natural and Man-Made Crises To Enlarge Government Intervention and Control in Markets, Industries, and Communities (as Well as Back Yards, Bedrooms, and Bank Accounts)

• Political Accounting: Taking Credits, Deflecting Debits (media sound-bytes)

• Political Calculus: Trading Favors (fun scavenger hunt format covers wines, cigars, dives, dames (or...), and many other items of interest to those seeking to cozy up to other self-inflated politicos and self-important big shots)

• Tactical and Strategic Retreats: Keeping a Weather Eye on the Rivers and Fords

• Rex Osborn's Bible: The Courtly Art of Character Assassination (private tutorials only; call author for rates - but if you call, he will not accept you as a student because an artful practitioner does not leave such tracks. See? Your first ninja lesson for free!)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

More credentials? Try reading the Manteca Bulletin announcement from last October.
Or, call the Elections Officer after the filing deadline, August 6th, and get the information required to be made public by candidates.
Or, call me for a brief chat (phone number in the public filings.)
Or, go to a city council meeting; I'm usually there.
Or, toss me one of your credentials, then I'll toss you one of mine. (Hint: I'm not a rocket scientist.)

One commenter gets it: "Bottom line, it's because this city will not lift a finger to assist him about these terrible neighbors."

And another: "Behling became interested in running because of the problems he's had with his neighbors and code enforcement but he's not a government employee or a career politician and seems to be smart enough so I'm going to vote for him."

And, to be fair and balanced, I include a back-handed endorsement by my ex-catering truck driver, pot-smoking neighbor, Mellow Yellow Lynda:

Ms. Allen: ... He has nothing else to do or he would not have written those two big books.
Mayor Weatherford: I don't think we want to get into the personal issues here.
Ms. Allen: Well, I try not to do that, but I'm just saying that somebody has a little extra time on their hands. (audience laughs)

Gotta love Lynda's gravelly voice, the Pinole-girl accent and her redneck humor. (Hey! That's HER word. "We like rednecks.")

The bottom bottom line is: These pathetic $^%$&^s next door and downtown are what it took to overcome my inertia, which inertia besets ANYONE who contemplates offering himself up for public office. It is the spark; it is NOT the whole explosion.

Hit the polls on November 2nd. Take all your friends, if any, with you. Vote for whomever you believe will give you the most responsive government to your wants  desires  welfare needs  legitimate needs. Between you and the few other voters who bother to show up that day, you will get the government you elect. You will get the government you deserve, whether you vote or not.
.

The City Council Nomination Period Is Open

.

Today I met with the Election Officer of the City of Manteca and received the Nomination Paper-Official Filing Form.

The next step is to find twenty to thirty voters in Manteca who will lend their name to my nomination to stand as a candidate for city council.
.