Friday, July 9, 2010

There's A Reason It's Called "Dope"


This saga just keeps getting better and better! In the post, Shooting Yourself in the Foot, I asked what would happen if the BDGs shot themselves in the other foot? Already, here is their answer!

On June 12, 2010, I discovered this unusual “weed” growing in my yard, over near the portion of the fence which had recently been reconstructed by the neighbors. I had never seen this kind of plant on my property before and had no clue how it might have gotten there. I photographed it, pulled it up, and destroyed it. My friend came over to identify the plant and witness its destruction.

For comparison purposes, here is an internet picture of a young marijuana plant.

On July 8, 2010, I looked over the fence and saw this plant (below) in my neighbors’ yard. The leaf structure is identical to the plant I photographed in my yard on June 12th. (Now I know the source!) My friend again returned to verify this new discovery.

Another view from a different vantage point on July 8, 2010, showed a large number of these same plants being cultivated in the neighbors’ flower planter.

All three photographs were printed on 8x10 glossy paper and, at 2:00 p.m., my friend and I personally delivered them to the Manteca Police Department for investigation.

Perhaps I ought to call Channel 3 and offer them a follow up story to their noisy icemaker story – something along the lines of shutting down the illegal catering business and now the neighbors' illegal marijuana grow.

I did not bet against Lynda having a medical marijuana recommendation for her claimed “injuries.” But we are also positive that the "injured" one will follow the pot-growing laws METICULOUSLY - especially since she shares a fence with Sierra High School! Also, caregivers are not to partake and prescriptions are not transferrable, so sharing a toke with domestic partners or hired boy-toys is a definite no-no.

The Manteca Police Department called July 9, 2010 to say Lynda was given a copy of Manteca Municipal Code 8.35 Cultivation and Possession of Medical Marijuana and given a couple weeks to comply. (I wonder if I could get the MPD to deliver Lynda a copy of MMC 9.52 Residential Noise since she cannot seem to get her illegal radio playing under control? Oh, wait... she's a pothead now, so I have to be compaaassionate!) I'm sure she tried to claim her plants were grandfathered from when she was in the county (which she never was), but... cultivated marijuana is an annual, for you gardeners out there.

(WARNING to all the girls and boys thinking to jump the fence: There are vicious junkyard dogs roaming the property. But, to hell with the dogs - the owners are worse!)

The Manteca ordinance refers to a couple sections of California's Health and Safety Code, below.
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California Health and Safety Code 11362.5 (The Lawful Loophole)

11362.5. (a) This section shall be known and may be cited as the Compassionate Use Act of 1996.

(b) (1) The people of the State of California hereby find and declare that the purposes of the Compassionate Use Act of 1996 are as follows:
   (A) To ensure that seriously ill Californians have the right to obtain and use marijuana for medical purposes where that medical use is deemed appropriate and has been recommended by a physician who has determined that the person's health would benefit from the use of marijuana in the treatment of cancer, anorexia, AIDS, chronic pain, spasticity, glaucoma, arthritis, migraine, or any other illness for which marijuana provides relief. [Unfortunately, dope doesn't relieve Lynda's problems, it make them worse.]
   (B) To ensure that patients and their primary caregivers who obtain and use marijuana for medical purposes upon the recommendation of a physician are not subject to criminal prosecution or sanction.
   (C) To encourage the federal and state governments to implement a plan to provide for the safe and affordable distribution of marijuana to all patients in medical need of marijuana.
(2) Nothing in this section shall be construed to supersede legislation prohibiting persons from engaging in conduct that endangers others, nor to condone the diversion of marijuana for nonmedical purposes.
(c) Notwithstanding any other provision of law, no physician in this state shall be punished, or denied any right or privilege, for having recommended marijuana to a patient for medical purposes.
(d) Section 11357, relating to the possession of marijuana, and Section 11358, relating to the cultivation of marijuana, shall not apply to a patient, or to a patient's primary caregiver, who possesses or cultivates marijuana for the personal medical purposes of the patient upon the written or oral recommendation or approval of a physician.
(e) For the purposes of this section, "primary caregiver" means the individual designated by the person exempted under this section who has consistently assumed responsibility for the housing, health, or safety of that person.
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California Health and Safety Code 11362.77 (Allowable Limits)

11362.77. (a) A qualified patient or primary caregiver may possess no more than eight ounces of dried marijuana per qualified patient. In addition, a qualified patient or primary caregiver may also maintain no more than six mature or 12 immature marijuana plants per qualified patient.

(b) If a qualified patient or primary caregiver has a doctor's recommendation that this quantity does not meet the qualified patient's medical needs, the qualified patient or primary caregiver may possess an amount of marijuana consistent with the patient's needs.

(c) Counties and cities may retain or enact medical marijuana guidelines allowing qualified patients or primary caregivers to exceed the state limits set forth in subdivision (a).

(d) Only the dried mature processed flowers of female cannabis plant or the plant conversion shall be considered when determining allowable quantities of marijuana under this section.

(e) The Attorney General may recommend modifications to the possession or cultivation limits set forth in this section. These recommendations, if any, shall be made to the Legislature no later than December 1, 2005, and may be made only after public comment and consultation with interested organizations, including, but not limited to, patients, health care professionals, researchers, law enforcement, and local governments. Any recommended modification shall be consistent with the intent of this article and shall be based on currently available scientific research.

(f) A qualified patient or a person holding a valid identification card, or the designated primary caregiver of that qualified patient or person, may possess amounts of marijuana consistent with this article.
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I suggest getting a good reference manual in order to squeeze as much cannabis as possible from only six mature plants. This one looked good. (And we all know how much diligence Lynda puts into reading rule books and following the rules.)

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And as she reaches out her hand for another stick of gold
The Kid, he gasps, "Damn it, bitch! There's nothin' left to roll!"


And she reaches 'cross the table and grabs his bony sleeves
And crumbles his body between her hands, like dried and brittle leaves
Flicking out his teeth and bones like useless stems and seeds
And then she rolls him in a Zig-zag, and lights him like a roach
And the fastest man, with the fastest hands, goes up in a puff of smoke.
(From The Smokeoff, by Shel Silverstein)


Anonymous said...

You reported her to the police.....I hate people like you, cant you let the stoners be stoners and leave them to it, no harm to you is there, Oooo little weed plant in your back garden dig it up if you don't want it, i'd love to have random cannabis plants popping up in my garden, stop interfering in peoples lives, live yours instead.

noisemaker said...

Dopey stoners are dopey stoners; nothing I can do about that. In fact, you are a perfect example of one - someone who claims their self-granted "rights" while making no attempt to accomodate other's legitimate needs or natural rights. If you think this blog is about marijuana, you are farther gone than you - and only you - imagine.

The whole back story of this blog: Asshole neighbors who were too stoned and stupid to figure out how to accomodate anyone living next to them (ie., keep the noise from their illegal catering business to themselves), and Keystone Kops who do not even know zoning, noise, or marijuana laws, let alone enforce any of them...

"A little hope goes up in smoke. Just how it goes, goes without saying." (The Carpenters)